Eighteen years with MS, eight things I've learned:
* Seek advice, but
* trust yourself.
* Learn what you can, but
* don't become your illness.
* Fight if needed, but
* it's ok to back down.
* The options get fewer, but
* the choice remains yours.
:: Girl, you'll be a woman soon by Urge Overkill
Brand new year, same old tests.
Yet another blood test tomorrow to see if my lymphocytes have managed to struggle their way any closer to the magic 0.8 which means Cladribine clearance.
Reasons this is unlikely: they haven't managed it in more than a year, I have effing shingles, I remain utterly knackered, it's cold and, judging by previous readings, they seem to have liked the warm better.
Reasons it may happen: had some time off work over Christmas and essentially slept for a large chunk of it, MS nurse suggested I take multivitamins, time is passing and they're meant to rise as the months go by.
I'm honestly not hopeful. And I am beginning to resign myself to the likelihood of not being able to take my next course - and instead embarking on the deeply stressful process of choosing something else.
That is, if I can take something else after the battering my immune system has taken over the past year or so.
GAH!! As if the MS wasn't bad enough, it's all the other logistical and emotional shit that accompanies it which makes it so utterly exhausting and relentless.
As I read the other day, having a chronic illness is like being handed a full-time job you never applied for and can't quit.
An occasional day off would be nice though. Or a pay rise.
Or a helpful blood test.
:: Get lucky by Daft Punk, ft Pharrell Williams and Nile Rogers
