I need to start new drugs.
Tecfidera, that friendly little green (blue? aquamarine?) pill which has been with me twice a day for more than three years now, is no more.
My latest MRI scans and two relapses in eight months show that I need something more effective.
So I'm supposed to be swapping over to Cladribine at some point soon. However, this depends entirely on:
* my lymphocytes returning to a normal level
* the two hospitals I'm under communicating with each other
* the coronavirus infection rate which could well dictate whether or not I can start
All three requirements are things that are completely out of my control. And I don't like it.
You'd think I'd be used to having no say over this aspect of my life - more than 16 years of unpredictability should have sunk in by now.
But it's hugely frustrating and what concerns me is the unknown length of time I will be without any meds versus the ever-present risk of a relapse.
It's a bit unnerving.
So, to deal, I am taking on extra work hours (distraction and alternative worry) and reading dystopian fiction (distraction and someone else's worry.)
Not perfect solutions, but in an imperfect situation they will have to do.
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