Everything about you

So I appear to have reached that point in the relapse where I find the only sensible option is to take some time out to have a little bit of a grump.

This current state of sad face is caused by:

Seven weeks of not being able to breathe comfortably thanks to the hug. 

Seven weeks of relying on other people to do the driving.

Six weeks of being off balance.

Six weeks of pretending I'm ok to do the new work that I've started.

Four weeks of not being able to write, type, text or - and most importantly - apply eyeliner in any sort of an acceptable fashion.

Four weeks of feeling like I'm wearing damp clothing.

Four weeks of dragging myself through the day.

A few rare occasions of actually asking for help.

And (at some point of) every single day wondering if this will be the relapse that I never recover from.

So I'm allowing myself a small moment of pity and a few toys to be thrown out of the pram.

But I know this emotional downturn won't last for long. Speaking from far too much MS experience, I know it never usually does.

And I also know that whatever damage I am left with I will learn to live with.

So despite this week's choice of song, which is an excellent toy throwing anthem, I know that I don't have it in me either rationally or energywise to waste too much precious emotion on MS.

:: Everything about you by Ugly Kid Joe