Shingle bell rock

It's been a busy old time of late - hence the utter lack of blogs for December.

Not only has work hit a peak of frenzy, but general home life has too. 

There really has been no hope of resting, even though this is exactly what my MS team have been advising for a while.

They know they're right, I know they're right - and that rightness has now been proven in ANOTHER BOUT OF RUDDY SHINGLES.

Happy Christmas to me.

But I have now broken up from work and am going to try my very, very best to stop.

Not least because I don't want to face another disappointed phone call from my MS nurse.

Never mind Santa, it's her naughty list I really don't want to be on.

So festive greetings from me for a calm, restful, healthy and happy Christmas.

And a happy new year. Although goodness knows what it holds if the last two are anything to go by.

:: Jingle bell rock by Bobby Helms

Linger

In between last entry and this, I have managed to develop a UTI, swiftly followed by flipping shingles.

This is not my happy place.

The UTI was (hopefully) dealt with by antibiotics because, as anyone with MS knows, the two really do not mix.

The shingles though? GAH.

I knew that starting Cladribine meant they were likely to be a risk. And, when finishing work on Monday and getting ready for bed, I found a suspicious-looking rash across my stomach, this was my first thought.

So, next morning photos emailed to GP and neurologist have resulted in a diagnosis and antivirals.

Due to MS plus Cladribine, my neurologist has recommended a double course of antivirals so I'm currently swallowing what appear to be horse pills five times a day for fourteen days.

Feeling generally rubbish, as might be expected, as well as in a fair bit of pain. Although, weirdly, quite familiar pain as it's all the burney-stingy-sitting-on-nerves pain that MS has prepared me for so well. And so bloody thoroughly.

My main concern during this has been work and letting people down.

While what should be my main concern during this (as work has pointed out) is my health.

But it is so very, very hard to deal with this because every bit of time off work (and I had a few days recently when reacting to the Covid jab) means increased fear of being viewed as a burden, or not worthy of employing - which I already worry about as a disabled worker.

Added to which, I am currently a contractor, so don't have the security of other employees.

But panicking about all the above is not, the rational part of me knows, the best way to help myself feel better.

So for now it's a case of chugging down the (massive) tablets and hoping that neither the guilt, nor the nerve pain, lingers longer than I can face.

Pictured are the far more pleasant memorial shingles on Dobby's beach in Freshwater East. Fans of Harry Potter will know this is where the loyal elf took his final breath. We visited last summer - strangely emotional for a fictional character.

:: Linger by The Cranberries